Welcome to Friday Fudge. If it’s weird, funny, or strange motorcycle news, or it just plain won’t fit anywhere else on the site – you’ll find it here.
The show that wouldn’t die
Sons of Anarchy ended this week, much to the relief of serious motorcyclists everywhere. Just when it seemed the bad boy chopper craze of reality TV had ended, Sons of Anarchy came along with a tale of a fictional outlaw motorcycle gang, inspiring a whole new slew of middle-aged men into dreams of buying a hog and living the life of a bandit. Even worse was the number of young causeless rebels who couldn’t even afford the motorcycle, and simply made do with an SOA hoodie and perma-scowl plastered on their face as they wandered aimlessly, hoping a fistfight would break out.
Upon the show’s end Monday night, there was hope that that would all be behind us. Alas, in the hours following the show’s end, we caught word of a new cell phone game that will allow users to assume the role of a Sons of Anarchy club member. It’s called The Prospect. If the game starts you off by doing the things that prospects actually do (mopping vomit up after an all-night club drinking binge, etc., etc.), then we’d say its prospects of success are pretty grim.
Trouble with toilets
As a motorcyclist, you should be constantly on the lookout for unexpected road dangers. In the countryside, you need to worry about deer, moose or even livestock. In the city, you can expect to be occasionally cut off by other drivers. But one thing you don’t expect to encounter is a rogue toilet.
An Amsterdam man had this exact unpleasant experience, though. The hapless chap was innocently motoring down the roadway when he suddenly struck a toilet. Yes, you read that right.
Turns out, Amsterdam has automatically-elevated public toilets installed, that rise from the street at night to discourage public urination. They have similar toilets in Victoria, Seattle and San Francisco, we understand. The toilets aren’t supposed to randomly pop up – a technician comes by with a remote to activate them, and there’s no word on why the toilet burst up in front of the rider. Maybe it was a crap design?
Who needs a ramp for loading their bike? Not this guy. Well, not in the conventional sense, anyway.
Remember Carl Fogerty? Arguably history’s top World Superbike rider, we haven’t seen much of him since he retired from Ducati’s factory WSB team in 2000. That all changed a few weeks ago when he started competing on reality TV’s I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here. We’re not totally clear on what he had to do in this competition, but it seems to be some sort of Survivor-style show that revolved around competitors eating a lot of gross food.
How gross? Fogerty actually managed to win this competition (he’s now King of the Jungle), but not without chowing down on live mealworms, two fried tarantulas, three live cockroaches, ostrich anus and a camel’s penis. After winning, he said winning the show was the greatest thing that had ever happened to him. Funny – we would have said it was the most disgusting.
Hey, do you know what’s a good idea? Putting a helmet on before you hoon around on your dirt bike, that’s a good idea. Otherwise, your faceplant might take on a whole new meaning.