Blender power


What? No kickstarter?

Sometimes you just don’t want your drinks mixed with one of those whiny, petite little blenders they sell in discount stores. Sometimes you want horsepower in your margarita.

We can’t tell you how much power the new blender by On the Edge Marketing makes, because they didn’t tell us – but we can tell you that it’s one gas-guzzling 2-stroke-powered celery crunching stainless steel hunk of drink-mixing mayhem.

That’s right, we said gas-guzzling, and we said 2-stroke.

And it’s here right in time for Father’s Day. That is, if you can get your mitts off the handlebars long enough for Pops to take it for a spin.

That’s right, we said handlebars.

The motor is variable speed, so you can idle your way through a few ice cubes, or crank it up and blast a can of frozen pineapple juice to kingdom come. And the 85 oz. (2.5 litres) stainless steel pitcher should hold just about anything you want to turn into a liquid. No fancy ideas, now …

The Gas Powered Party Blender is $275 U.S., at csnstores dot com. Your father will never call you a sissy again.

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